Ahhh! White Noise!

The Earth is crying today. The weather is insanely mild with a reported high of 12 C today in my area (15 tomorrow). I'm going to use my time wisely and take down the Christmas lights and then all of the decorations inside. It's a hell of a job; that's why I'm writing instead of working.

I'm glad the Christmas holidays are over. It sounds awful but I'm happy to get everyone out of my hair. Husband and I got in a huuuuuuge argument after one of his throwing-out-stuff moods.

Apparently, he tossed our bassinet, which I wanted to keep partly because my grandparents gave it to me and because lots of babies slept in it. I even wrote their names in calligraphy with their birthdays and birth weight at the bottom. I was looking for it to give it to Baby Sister when Husband broke the news.

I swear, unless it's smaller than a loaf of bread (never mind a bread box), he'll toss it. I had to go to the Goodwill to buy back my crib when I found out he just donated it. It converts to a double bed, which might come in handy. It was disassembled and doesn't take up much room this way.

But you could imagine my surprise when I once saw my one and only teddy bear at the Goodwill on my occasional troll for shot glasses. My dad bought it for me on the day I was born. Teddy has been with me during all my surgeries, very lengthy hospital stays, first day of school, and was on my bed forever. Needless to say, I bought him back. Fucker.

Typical Husband, though. I wanted to discuss this like adults should and he left the house for, like, all day and most of the night. I thought for a moment that I should just pack up the kids and fuck off somewhere without a forwarding note, but two wrongs don't make a right. So I waited. And waited. Daughter picked up on the bad air and told me she was scared. Poor thing. I hope I calmed her. She gave her dad an earful the next morning, though.

But that's his way. I need to remind myself that he's from a fucked-up family. If physically running away from a problem is his way of coping or whatever, then I should count my blessings. There are worse things.

Anyway, all is fine now, I suppose. He's back to work. The kids are all in school. My exercise classes are back to their regular schedule and I am thinking that I need to take a long, hard look at myself. I should make a resolution. But will I?