More GTA Barbies

MUSKOKA BARBIE: She's perfect in every way. Available only in the summer months and usually only on weekends. St. Joseph Dream Cottage available for a cool $10 million.












JANE AND FINCH BARBIE: This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9 mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a meth lab kit. This model only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills)...unless you are a cop, and then we don't know what you're talking about.










QUEEN'S QUAY BARBIE: This collagen-injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available as well as warehouse conversion condo.














OSHAWA BARBIE: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud Light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD. She can spit over five feet and can kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she's drunk. Purchase her pickup separately and get a Confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.














OAKVILLE BARBIE: This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.